20 Oct 2015

is "I'm a single mother" the new power phrase?

When I read in a UK daily newspaper that divorced people and especially divorced women still in this day and age feel ashamed of the fact that they are divorced and that many of them prefer not to tell friends and acquaintances right away that they had ended their marriage and that it takes divorced women - especially - at least four years to get their lives back on track and for them to feel some normality in their lives again I was genuinely surprised! If I had read this about a conservative traditional religious country like the one I’m originally from (Kuwait) I would have easily believed it, but in a country as forward, as diverse and as liberal as the UK, I truly didn’t expect divorce to still constitute such a social stigma. However, in contrast to the above there is another small but evident social movement led by single mothers; I’ve noticed on many occasions whilst attending talks, seminars or even personal development courses women saying out loud that they are single mothers, but this statement was not spoken in a stigmatized, apologetic, disadvantaged manner, but in a manner that reinforces power, to prove strength, ambition, courage and endurance. When these women were asking questions or acquiring more information from seminar speakers or trainers they were starting their statements with “as a single mother I have a lot on my hands but..” or “as a single mother I need to be extra organized..” or “because I’m a single mother I always make sure that..” these women have a sense of pride in their single-motherhood they acknowledge their own strengths and sense of accomplishment and flaunt this not expecting sympathy or special treatment but demanding admiration and respect. As a divorced single mother myself I find this inspiring and empowering, it might not be a widely spread movement getting a lot of media attention, but a quiet assertive revolution for women.