1 Aug 2012

I found our e-mails

For my dear and darling friend Fred Holland who died suffering a heart condition on May 30th 2011.

I found our e-mails; rich, sophisticated and intelligent, spilling marvelous philosophy on love, loss and life, It never occurred to me you would go gently in the long unbroken silence..
When I think of you, I don't remember your last days; frail, ill, crippled in a hospital bed, hardly conscious of me saying goodbye
I remember you on that fine spring day when we walked in the park, young green leaves, healthy, alive, sparkled like confetti above our heads, language grew enormous in our incessant ideas
How can a beautiful mind like yours be buried under the mud? Why would a strong heart like yours give up?
You said to me once "love is like air, if you try to hold it, it disappears"
I could not hold on to our love but I hold every moment spent with you,
I hold them close.