such a

I scrubbed the clotted chocolate icing off the fork – such a feeling of guilt to it

I washed the stubborn paint off my brushes – such an absoluteness to it

I rubbed the anti-aging cream onto my face – such an apprehension to it

I erased the number off my phone such a sadness to it.

I imagine you would know!

Sometimes I’d want to call and ask you “who am I?”
I imagine you’d know

The years have reshaped me, remolded me, the way waves reshape pebbles on the shore

I want to see myself again, meet myself again, acquaint with myself again, 

learn the simple things about me; where I’ve from? where I hope to go? The sound of my voice, the

familiar tilt of my head, the simple wisdom of my body. 

My dreams; 

What are they?

What were they?

Where they'd gone?